Am I a "Gretchen"?

So Project Runway just finished up its 8th season. I don't watch very many shows, but for some reason I keep up with this one. I am pretty much down to this and Mad Men, and occasional episodes of Parenthood. I usually catch the shows on demand and my cable programmer hasn't picked up the finale yet, so I haven't seen it. I do know who the winner is, thanks to these here internets. Apparently, this year's winner is very controversial.

Collections aside, no one really liked this gal. Not the people on the show, not the people watching, maybe not even Tim Gunn. Her nickname was wretchen. The thing is, I really don't see what the big deal was. She was opinionated, but it seemed to me, to stem from her passion around design. From a fashion standpoint she had a really strong point of view.

On one show, she got stuck in one of those I should stop talking moments while standing up for a group project before being prodded by the judges to pick out a loser. She ended up completely contradicting herself, but in fairness, no one else spoke up either and they totally put her on the spot. There was another episode where the designers had to make clothes for Heidi Klum's new sports line, Gretchen mentions to Heidi, "I made what I thought was missing from the collection." During judging, Heidi got snippy. Who was Gretchen to tell her what was missing? An aspiring designer trying to bring something useful to the table, that's who.

Anyway, I am not one of those people to go on and on about a television show and we all know that reality programs are the opposite of real. But I found myself feeling sorry for this chick. She's a little outspoken, takes herself too seriously, likely to be the first person to speak in a group (a little too often), bossy, but also tenderhearted, and genuine, someone who tries to learn from her mistakes. Just like me.

Am I a Gretchen? Yikes.

Reality Bites

Last year I finally gave up on the MTV reality show, The Real World, after coming to terms with the fact that I am almost twenty years older than most of the cast, and really, the show has all been pretty much the same since the first Las Vegas season filmed over ten years ago. So, when I need a little dose of fake reality, I watch: Top Chef, Rachel Zoe Project, and Project Runway. I also dabble in a little Real Housewives, but only Atlanta because I used to live there. Earlier this year, I was following Jon and Kate, before the hate, but have given that up for obvious reasons.

I love the two fashion shows for the clothes and the creativity. Though Rachel Zoe is a nut job, she has an eye for what she likes and the balls to ask for it. I can relate to the fact that she is a total conflict avoider, while at the same time insanely opinionated. Project Runway is always good for a little drama, but the design process is what keeps me hooked. I love watching the designers make the clothes appear like magic and Tim Gunn's arched eyebrow really works for me.

Which brings me to Top Chef, and the real point of this post. Are you still with me?

This season, the women are dropping off the show like crazy and I can't help but compare how the sexes are managing the competition and stress. I have yet to see a guy burst into tears on the show or rattle on during the monologues about how he is feeling about his work. The dudes, despite various levels of skill, seem mostly focused and confident. I think it is natural and maybe almost expected, for women to constantly question ourselves and our motivations. Sometimes, as a result of our proclivity to sensitivity, we get in in our own way.

So lately, when I find myself getting sidetracked by my inner dialogue, I picture myself in a chef's jacket, slicing and dicing, juggling pots and pans, and everything sizzling away, time running out, but I am not rattled. I am completely focused.

So there you go, life lessons from a reality show. And they say television is bad for you...