Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Dear Universe

I know you have this thing about me listening to you when you are trying to teach me a lesson. The thing is, I have been trying really hard to get on board. The control stuff? The being happy in the moment? The whole self absorbed thing? I have been working on it. Really.

Like the fact that within a few days I might or might not be leaving town for the month with two kids and a dog but still don't know the when/where/how details of such adventures? Not even sweating it. Like the fact that I can't pick a class for the fall until my baby sitter gets her college schedule situated? Not a second thought about it. Like the fact that my sleep situation has gone back to dodgy since travelling to the east coast and I spent the last two nights sweaty and sleepless on the couch? Not over thinking that one even a bit.

And best of all, when I visited my previous life and most importantly my sweet little store, did I cry? Did I chain myself to the door frame and refuse to leave? Did I even whine for a second about how much I miss the personal satisfaction from running my own business, and, let's be honest here, making a little of my own damn money? Nope.

So really, Universe, don't you think it's time for you to throw me a rope?

Here's what I propose:
As a reward for my good behavior, would it be possible for you to listen to me? Just this one time? You see, I would like some itty bitty teeny tiny validation. Maybe a small writing job? Just a few bucks to prove to myself that I've still got it? Something easy, but satisfying, mostly on my terms, and still awesome. Okay, I'll just say it, something to brag about a little. But I won't. Brag. But I could.

Then I will go back to knowing that it's not all about me, I can't control any of it, and I will be happy no matter what.

I look forward to your response. Thank you for your consideration.

Mental Momma


Lisa said...

It's coming, it's coming - I can feel it!!

latisha said...

me too me too!