Saturday, March 14, 2009

Getting some zzzz's

I finally started sleeping with my husband again.

No, I don't mean that.

I really mean sleeping.

I have been fighting some terrible insomnia since my son was born. When it first started happening, I researched cures. I tried teas and baths and mantras. I visited an acupuncturist and kept a sleep journal. I practiced visualization techniques, counted backwards, and read books until my eyes stung from the effort. Still, I could not sleep. I tried medications and suffered side affects almost as bad as the sleeplessness.

The more I tried to fix it, the worse it got. At one point I was living on around three hours a night, and they weren't even three consecutive hours. It was hell.

Gradually, it got a little better, and I found that if I slept on the couch, I could squeeze out five almost consecutive hours. After being so exhausted, the couch sleep was such a gift and so I stuck with it. Eventually, I moved on to two hours in bed followed by four or so on the couch. That went on for quite a long time.

While I was grateful for the rest, I still missed waking up next to my guy in the mornings. Plus, there is something about having such a crazy routine that made me feel, well, crazy. And sort of like I had this weird big secret. I kept trying to give up the couch, but I would just lay there awake in bed, anxious about not getting up. I needed the couch, and was all the while totally aware that it was all in my head. Like I said, crazy.

And then recently something strange happened. I started sleeping through the night in my bed again. I still wake up and toss around, but I can fall back asleep. I still have a routine to get to sleep, but I am in bed, next to my hubby until morning. And I am sleeping more solidly too. All this, unexpectedly, after feeling pretty sure that I would never sleep through the night again. It's heavenly.

And it all started when I started getting up early to write.

Uh huh. I know. Crazy.


Amy said...

not crazy at all! very cool. i found that when i started going to bed later and getting up earlier, i slept better too. now i have a five year old kicking me most of the night -- not a good twist, although when she pats me on the cheek it more than makes up for it.... hope sedona is/was great!

latisha said...

its nice to have somewhere to put your cobwebs instead of letting them cloud your awake thoughts. ever since you said you do this, ive been trying but i just cant pull myself out of bed...